Defintion, Direction and Purpose–Part 2

Let’s pick up from that last post.

What’s the bottom line about having a clear Definition, Direction and Purpose, a clear DDP? Nine out of ten people cannot clearly articulate what they are trying to do, and the same nine out of ten wonder why what they want is not happening. Be the one out of ten that does know and doesn’t have to wonder. Write a DDP. Try it.

“For he that hath, to him shall be given:and he that hath not, from him shall be taken even that which he hath.” Mark 4:25

I know what you may be thinking. “Well, Otis has that insight and that is fine for him but I don’t have that insight and I don’t understand the process and he does this all the time and so I can’t write a good DDP. That just isn’t where I am. I will wait until I can have a good one.” (Arms folded and crossed.)

I am here to tell you that is some backasswards thinking. And you get what you deserve if you stick with it. How on God’s green earth can any of us move forward until we own what we’ve got and have been given? Even if you are indulging in the belief you have very little, at least own that. Capture it in a form where you can learn to value it. If you do, you will see that you have more and more value.

The above scripture captures it so well–if you do not value what you’ve been given, and therefore perceive you have very little, even that will be taken from you. But if you value what you have, and therefore perceive to have a lot that you can and should value, even more will be given to you.

So you want to serve? You cannot add much value at all until you value what you have already added to your own life and experience. Writing and working with and evolving a DDP is a wonderful way to “ground” on the physical plane your intent to take up in your own hands what you already have, and begin to use that to built what you know you are capable of but have been avoiding, shying away from or denying.

My DDP isn’t perfect, and it probably doesn’t pertain to you. But at least it will help you understand a bit about what “becoming a leader” means to me. And, I hope, that it might prompt you to write your own. And more importantly, to breathe life into it, to bring it alive, through action.

Take what you already have, and use it with all  you’ve got. You lack nothing other than the willingness to do exactly that. And the best way I’ve found to start, is with a Definition, Direction and Purpose. Why? Because it is awful hard to get a feeling for where you are going if you don’t know where you are, and it is very hard to know where you are if you cannot value what has brought you here.

Below you will see my primary DDP statement, followed by a list of intentions that “flesh out” the DDP statement.

How do you know when you’ve got a good DDP statement? If it strikes a chord in you and if it causes you to act, you’ve got a good one. I can read my DDP and it does both things for me–it inspires me, and I can clearly get a sense for the next actions I need to take, and I take them. Sharing this with you is one of those actions.

My Definition, Direction and Purpose

I want to become a true leader in this world,
one relevant to these times.

In doing this, I want:
•    to become fully authentic;
•    to collaborate with others;
•    to learn to co-create with the invisible forces of life.

I want to perform work relevant to these times that others want and need and that aligns with my passion, training, experience and soul’s purpose.

In doing this, I want:
•    financial success, providing well for me and my family;
•    quality of life with my self, family and friends;
•    a beautiful place to live in an area, on land, in a house we love; and
•    community, to relate in truly meaningful ways with others near and far.

Definition, Direction and Purpose–Part 1

“If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.”

Lao Tzu

I suppose a good place to start sharing with you about my path to becoming a leader is to let you in on where I am headed. This way, as I take my steps and share them with you, that sharing will have context. I will borrow from the work of Machaelle Small Wright, an provide this to you in the context of my DDP, my Definition, Direction and Purpose. Some might call it a vision statement, others a purpose statement and others a mission.

My DDP has evolved over time. Initially, my work DDP was more about work than it was about me. As I became more clear about what I both want and need, my work DDP has changed to reflect that.

At this point, my work DDP is now focused more on me (becoming a leader) than the construct or form in which I do that. I can become a leader in any forum, really. In my marriage with my wife. In my relationships with friends and family. Working as a consultant. Working as a team member within a team.

Months ago, I made a very subtle change in my DDP which was related to this last turn in my journey. My prior DDP was about doing work where I share my knowledge of leadership with others. Then, at a feeling level, I felt something was “off.” I felt compelled to simply say that I wanted to become a leader, and just trust that my work would flow from that. Why is that important?

Two male friends of mine, both of whom were clients, just emailed me and told me where they were at with their work. Both are at different points in launching new businesses and trying to figure out what their focus and message is. I shared with them the most important thing I have learned–it doesn’t matter what you say you will do, or try to do, if it is not born of your own experience, your own passion and reflective of your own self-knowledge.

I am increasingly aware that the only thing of value I really have is my own self-knowledge, my own experience/talent, and my willingness and capacity to share both with others. And not to “tell” someone what to do, or give them my framework, or whatever. But to let them know that I understand, that I have been through it and that they can, too, and maybe to ask a meaningful, feeling provoking question or point to something that, upon seeing it, might activate their own inner guidance.

I am telling you this because my DDP has evolved, it has evolved because of my evolving knowledge of my self, and my work is changing as a result. It is really, really easy to get that backwards. For years I searched for the right mentor, for the right framework, for the right focus, for the right profession, for the right company, for the right niche, for the right market, for the right combination of things. And all along the way, I was leaving my own self, my own knowledge, my own value, out of the equation.

In my next post, we will wrap this up and I will share my DDP with you. Stay tuned!

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Hello World! (The First Post)

Sara and I were sitting in the small town park of Monticello, UT on September 22, 2008. We’d just driven on our BMW motorcycles from Moab, UT through a cold, cutting wind and were making our way to Pagosa Hot Springs, CO. We pulled over to a gas station, got some hot water to make tea, and walked across the road to a small park. It was 9:40 am.

A rose garden was there in this quaint, small park and there was just a bit of life left in the roses. The wind was still strong, and with hands cupped around our tea, we made our way to a picnic table to settle ourselves. Now, 9:42 am.

We were there for a pause–to watch and listen for a few minutes as the autumn equinox rolled in. And there it came. The wind died quickly, the anointed moment came, 9:44 am, the stillness spoke, a minute lingered in stillness, the autumnal equinox rolled in, and the wind picked up again. And so did we. We mounted our bikes, and headed east.

Why were we there, and why did we stop? From the perspective of nature, the autumnal equinox ushers in a new cycle. And just as we can welcome the start of a new cycle in nature, we can ask for a new cycle for ourselves. We were there for both.

We really didn’t know what we were asking for. At least I didn’t. But we asked for the new to come in. And if you don’t know what you are asking for, it is awful hard to be disappointed. I haven’t been.

What I wanted was a new direction in my work and life. Fired from my corporate job seven years ago, I’d built a successful business consulting and executive coaching business. But it seemed like there was more. Further, Sara and I wanted to create a new life, to move from the beautiful high desert of Santa Fe, NM to the verdant Willamette Valley between Portland and Eugene. [Yes, we know it rains there 210 days out of the year.]

The reason this is relevant to this first post and this blog is that here we are, six months later, March 20, 2009 at 4:44 am on the vernal equinox, the time when nature shifts (springs!) from intent (autumnal equinox) and design (winter solstice) into manifestation. It is arising. And the statement of my desire six months ago in that small-town Utah park is taking form now.

My life is changing. Sara and I now live in Oregon. And we are close to buying 5-10 acres of land here, stepping into a life neither of us have lived and hoping that friends and family will join us in the future to shape a new future together.

My work is changing. I have suspended my business. I now work with one client full time, becoming, in effect, more like an employee. There, I am becoming a leader and a team member of a large transformation effort in a half a billion dollar company. After seven years, I’ve decided to stop teaching leadership and to instead, well, to be one for a year.

This blog is about that journey. What one man is learning as he becomes a leader, one relevant to these new times. Perhaps it is even about becoming a true male, too. I hope you enjoy what I have to share, that in some way you find it helpful, and that you will provide me with your input and your comments along the way.